The Story of Canny the Butcher
Oh, come hither, my children, and the story shall be told of Canny the Butcher.Canny cared little for paltry and difficult matters like hacking or, dare he mention the dreaded subject, "botany", glorified flower-picking, Canny picked only the manliest of traits; STRENGTH! MELEE! NIGHT VISION! BOTANY ANYWAY! And so, his epic adventure began.It didn't take long for Canny to make enemies. Armed with nothing but a multitool, Canny poked holes in any bandit foolish enough to approach him armed. Soon, however, he acquired a more fitting weapon; a cleaver. Canny, rather than pursue worthless objectives and missions, explored the wasteland, destroying everything in his way with nothing a cleaver in one hand and the other a bag, filled with nothing but more bags. He cut up Dogmen and Looters, Thieves and Lowlifes, and anything stupid or ballsy enough to get in his way. Hunger and Drink was never an issue; four college shirts and an endless supply of ketchup prevented him from death. But what could end such a spectacular villain? A man with such a legacy?An ailment so powerful it ended the life of our hero?Organ Failure.